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Showing posts from October, 2011

A Quiet Heart

To love and lead out of a place of rest and quiet is something I've been asking for for so long. And God is answering my prayer. This week He's giving me a glimpse of what it means to be quiet. To not have to push my way. To not be anxious over to-dos and not-yet-dones... To rest. I am at an event that requires my attention, my energy, and my time, and a lot of it, but I feel peaceful! I don't think it's just due to the fact that the job is so big and I can't possibly do it. It's more than that. When my kids were young we subscribed to the parenting philosophy that kids should just eat all day long. Small meals, snacks some would call it. We had people who thought we were spoiling their appetite but I found that it just helped them grow and mealtimes were no longer a fight. In a similar way, I've been snacking on quiet times throughout my day. Short periods of solitude and rest have been part of my diet, though I know I should probably move to longer p

The blessing of a fall

Been listening to Laura Story's song, Blessing.... it's made me think. I was preparing to lead worship for a spiritual retreat next week. Worshiping with my heart, singing loudly while my sweet husband gave me the afternoon off to prepare. Headphones on, I was in the Spirit. What if your blessings come through raindrops What if Your healing comes through tears What if the thousand sleepless nights are what it takes to know You're near What if trials of this life are Your mercies in disguise....   I was thinking about those words, asking Father for grace to trust Him even when the blessings as I know them aren't as evident. The wood stairs were slippery. Carrying garbage downstairs, I slipped, hitting my tailbone so hard I laid on our floor almost in tears. That was about twenty minutes after that prayer. I've been asking the question, what is it like to live life present, awake, cognizant in heart and mind,to what God is doing in my life and in the liv

Do I have to run?

I wished it was raining but that morning it wasn't. Feeling guilty for even wishing we didn't have to run this morning made me feel worse. Sometimes mom isn't any better than her kids. I lecture about the need to exercise and take care of the bodies God has given us, I drag my kids out of bed when their alarms have tired of ringing, and my husband and I meet the kids outside each morning to run our 1 1/2 mile track through our neighborhood. But this morning, tiredness took over and I wasn't so eager to run. I've been meditating on the disciplines of the Christian life, study of Scripture, prayer, meditation, fasting, solitude, worship, the things that help us stay on track and get spiritually fit. It's not always easy to maintain these disciplines, and many of us can easily find excuses for why we're not doing any of these things. I've logged most excuses, defending my role as a wife, mom, homeschool teacher, and other ministry roles I've played