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Showing posts from April, 2010

Feelings of irrelevance

What have I done anyways in the last 11 years?
Was it worth it? Raising my family in a country that we'll never fit into.
Has my life made any difference here?
Does anyone care? Questions like these have been plaguing my soul. Feelings of irrelevance have pervaded my heart as of late. What does it matter that I live here?
Does it matter?
A phone call yesterday tipped me over the edge. A friend whom I have walked with over the few years is coming to a city nearby (she lives far away) I found out through another friend. I'm so thrilled she's coming, but I felt hurt that she didn't call me. I have walked with her through some difficult valleys. She actually was one of my personal deep valleys. She wasn't exactly easy to love! But God used our friendship in each of our lives and I am thankful that our paths crossed for those years. But that's just what happened. They crossed, and now that season is over. How sad is that? My relational heart aches. How many more peo…

Help, I'm a parent of a teen!

I really am not old enough for this. I really don't know what I'm doing. I told my son just this afternoon, that I've never had a 13 year old son before! This is all new to me. And because it's new, I might make some mistakes. Actually, the truth is, I make mistakes anyways teen or no teen.

When I was pregnant with my oldest, my mom gave me this passage. Deuteronomy 6:6 "And these words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart; and you shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up." "These words" refer to the command God gives in the previous verse, "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul and with all your might." We've tried to do that. My husband and I. We've tried to do that with our kids around mealtimes, brushing teeth, before bed. As parents, we plant those seeds of…

Complete Obedience

I have asked it of my kids since they were small. First time obedience. Come when Mommy calls you. Thank you for obeying right away. Thank you for doing just what Mommy has asked. These words are encouragement for my kids to keep doing what is right. I know God asks of this me too. Even more. First time. Whole hearted obedience. He asks even more of His children because He sees the heart.

I read through Joshua 7 this past week where Joshua is wrestling with God over their recent defeat at Ai. God, you've promised us victory, what has happened? Distraught he asks, "What will You do for Your great name?"

The Lord speaks courage to Joshua and asks him to rise. He reveals to Joshua that Israel has sinned. All of Israel? Someone has stolen, and deceived. Joshua had given explicit orders to take nothing after hte battle of Jericho. God had made a covenant with His people before they had crossed into Jordan, the land promised to them. The Lord had promised victory, all of th…