Loving God and Loving Others

The lady looks over her shoulder as she pours the fresh yak milk into a large pot. Can I keep him? She grins. He has no idea what she is asking. My son, that is. Eight years old and taking it all in. The new, the different, even the strange. He squats down near his friend and drinks the yogurt that she has just served him. We’re in Mongolia. Very far from home, we are in one of the most landlocked areas of the world. This gher, a white domed portable tent, is home to a precious family and some of their animals. The rest of the animals live in a pen next to them. There is no sign of other families around them for as far as I can see. Over the hill I have been told are a few more families. It’s amazing. We live in a complex with over 6,000 people. 45 buildings and lots of people. This country of 3 million could fit into a small part of our city, our city that numbers close to 11 million. Bumping along dirt roads with only a compass, we made our way via a four-wheel drive from the cap...

I love markets in the morning. Breakfast vendors flipping pancakes and frying eggs, the Chinese version of a breakfast burrito. Wooden stools and makeshift tables crowd the sidewalks; people come out of their apartments for their daily breakfast fare. Spread on the ground, a man on his stomach crawls his way through the throngs of people. A radio, strapped to his back, blares Chinese opera. Notice me, he says. He's on the ground. It's easy to miss him. People avert their eyes, dodging him with near misses as they clutch their saran wrap thin plastic bags tight. My daughter and I walk through the market towards violin lessons on the other side. I love early mornings, I tell her. I am reminded why I'm living here in this country. While the rich seem to be getting richer, the poor, well, it's the opposite. A soy milk lady's stand. She pours freshly made soy milk into plastic cups for potential customers. An old man sits on a small stool fixing bikes. A pile of sp...

Discouragement flooded my heart the other day as I thought about an emotional breakdown I had last week. Really? I thought I was over that. Why do some of the same things that I’ve been dealing with for years continue to come up? Haven’t I experienced victory in that already? Can it be that I need to continue to learning that lesson until I go home to meet You, Lord? Am I growing? Is there fruit? How can I change? Is there hope for one like me? Abide in Me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me. (John 15:4) Fruit bearing comes only by way of abiding.   How do I then abide? What does this mean? Every branch in me that doesn’t bear fruit he takes away, and every branch that does bear fruit he prunes, that it may bear more fruit. John 15:2 The Master Gardener prunes me that I may bear more fruit. Less of me and more of Him. That was John the Baptist’s prayer. It’s mine, too. But i...

It was just that. A surprise. One after another. I was caught off-guard by this past week’s circumstances. Life seems to throw curveball and sometimes they all land in the same week. Father saw fit to shake up my faith and remind me of His sovereignty and perfect grace in a hard way. Perhaps the journey had just slipped into a comfortable pace and I was really enjoying it. Then things began to happen. Though not one particular situation, it seems that altogether they formed one perfect storm. Perfect in the sense that I was left desperate for God. Perfect in the sense that it pushed me to my knees. Relational issues do that. They are by far more exhausting for the heart than many of life’s problems. Guarding my heart from anxiousness and fear is not always easy when things in my relational world aren’t faring well. I know I’m not alone in this. By Thursday, I was running into my afternoon of solitude depleted and weary. My sweet husband took over homeschooling and I locked myself i...

I peer into the taxi. I was hoping to take the bus this morning but I’d never get there in time for w-ship at our friends’ home. The kids pile into the back of the car. I exchange greetings and directions with the driver. Father, will you direct this conversation? I need you .   The usual exchange dominates most of the first half of the car ride. 3 kids? All yours? You must make tons of money! How much does your husband make? (I am certainly not going to add that I have one more son who’s not with us this morning.) Where are you from? (I brace myself as usually the next half of the drive is about my sucky Chinese and how I should have learned better.) But we don’t go there this morning. Thankful.   I don’t   mince words . I’m going to ch-rch this morning with my kids. I’m a follower of J-sus. Have you ever heard of J-sus? Time’s running out and I may never see this man again. I share with him a little of my faith. His silence tempts me to be quiet. I believe in Pusa,...

I saw a little girl on the stairs of the skytrain last night. Dolled up pretty, plastic beads, two pigtails, and a pink dress. Just like any 6 year old would like it. Except, she had a large 7-11 cup in her hand. Begging for money, she. We're in Bangkok for a few days before heading back to our home in the East. It's supposed to be a few days of "regrouping" as a family, as we like to call it. Busyness can take over our life so easily and we know if we don't mark out time to rest, then we won't do it. But even though I'm in a comfortable restful place this morning, my heart is uneasy. As I passed this little girl I stopped for a moment and uttered more like a gasp. What's her life going to be like? Where will she go next? With pretty looks like her will they keep her doing what they're asking her to? Will it get worse? I put my hand out over her and prayed for her. Mercy, Lord. Please have mercy. Don't let the darkness overwhelm her. Bring ...

Took a spiritual retreat today. My sweet husband took over the homeschooling for the day. I left the house before the kids got up, just long enough to write out assignments for the older ones and to lay out books for our youngest. I ran out as fast as I could seeing that I am highly distractable and a pile of dishes soon could be beckoning me home. I went to my parents home which is empty for the day. They're returning from a trip this evening so it worked out. After brewing that important first cup of coffee I sat down on the couch with my pile of books, my Bible and my journal. I began as I always do. Writing out blessings, things for which I'm so thankful for. Johanna's 6 teeth that were successfully pulled Elijah's 2 teeth that were yanked out yesterday- thankful he's not too mad at us! For a day to rest and quiet down, to reflect and to pray That I'm an extrovert and a day retreat will energize me for the month For seasons For the Father's love...